Member-only story
To Love is to Be Free
One of the best feelings is to be loved, honestly.
Humans and free will are like two doves in a pair. One cannot exist without the other. Usually, the more freedom you give, the more the other person starts loving you. Control repels people.
Love and control never go hand in hand. Control is the antithesis of love.
I’ve been in years worth of control and abuse, and it’s not love. It’s pure suffering. The weirdest part is that you start hating yourself in the midst of that.
I firmly believe that love is freeing for the other person and that’s how two people start falling in love. That’s the real “falling in love.”
It makes you fall in love with yourself as well. Control does the literal opposite. It never occurred to me until now how much control really hurts two people in a dynamic.
Self-loathing and lack of self-acceptance also play a part in this dynamic. The more we loathe ourselves, the more we drain our self-esteem, and the more misery love company. The more that same miserable company loves to control others.
It’s like a domino effect and perfectly explains why narcissists are miserable
Things should flow naturally, there should never be an aspect of control. In the end, you always win…
