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Family Isn’t Always Blood
Blood is thicker than water, applies to the people you choose in this lifetime.
TW: physical, emotional, and psychological abuse is mentioned.
I was always taught I’m “good for nothing” and “never worthy of life.” It was demonstrated so much, that I recently remembered I was abused physically a few times, and couldn’t remember the incident as clearly as other people. It was alarming.
It reminded me as to why my paternal side of the family stood for violence against me —they hated my presence.
You see, the thing about Indian families, is that they make it a taboo to discuss abuse when that shouldn’t be the case. They apparently think family matters should stay within the home.
My mother was trapped in this marriage all these years, no one came to ask her how she was doing — the man gets all the privilege in the business deal we know as “marriage.” In the eyes of society, it’s for him to thrive, not her. If she thrives, it’s because of him.
When we are courted or pursued, I laugh at how society now thinks it’s okay to have below-bare-minimum-effort and standards. Often times they recollect that “he doesn’t owe you anything,” and fail to mention that the woman doesn’t “owe” her hand nor efforts in marriage either.
